Menu
NOTES FROM THE FIELD: Where are Alan Baratz, Phil White?

NOTES FROM THE FIELD: Where are Alan Baratz, Phil White?

Trudging across the Mojave Desert on my way back from Las Vegas, I had plenty of time to contemplate the most recent events in the war between Microsoft and the Department of Justice. All of a sudden a strange thought came to me: wouldn't it be cool if Bill Gates were testifying at the hearings and all of a sudden he stood up and started screaming: "I give up! You're right! We've been bullying everyone for years!"

Yea, right. I quickly came to my senses and decided I needed to take a rest. Just in time, I spotted a guava drink vendor up ahead. I panted as I got to the stand.

"Si, senor?" said Juan, the proprietor. After downing a couple of glasses of the guava nectar, I noticed that Juan was wearing a particularly spiffy Microsoft Windows 98 T-shirt. After my delusional musings, I figured that a chat about Microsoft would keep me in reality. "Where did you get that shirt?" I asked. "Ah, senor, it was given to me by a man with the name of Alan Baratz. He himself was wearing a T-shirt that said president of JavaSoft on it," Juan said.

"But why would Alan Baratz have a Microsoft T-shirt?" I thought out loud.

"I don't know, senor," said Juan. "But he did say that the HR departments at Microsoft and Netscape had given him a T-shirt when he dropped off his resumé."

After finishing my drink, I caught the next Greyhound bus to California - no more vultures for me, thank you very much.

Unfortunately, I fell asleep and missed the stop in San Francisco, but woke up just north of the city in San Rafael. Well, heck, as long as I was in the area, I figured I'd just mosey on over to San Quentin prison and see if Phil White, ex-CEO of Informix, had a reservation. Poor Phil, he has too-many-to-count lawsuits filed against him for financial shenanigans at Informix.

Alas, the prison guard said that Phil wasn't on the inmate list yet, but did a quick search and found Phil on the Internet as a board member at Tripco, a messaging middleware company now owned by Reuters. "Word is," whispered the prison guard, "Phil is making sales calls for Tripco now. Quite a step down, don'cha think?"


Follow Us

Join the newsletter!

Or

Sign up to gain exclusive access to email subscriptions, event invitations, competitions, giveaways, and much more.

Membership is free, and your security and privacy remain protected. View our privacy policy before signing up.

Error: Please check your email address.
Show Comments