Tabloid - Briefs

Tabloid - Briefs

Tabloid - Briefs

The battle of the joke-off

It seems that the CEOs were engaged in another battle of wits at Fall Comdex 99 last week.

DOJ-embattled Microsoft boss Gates opened his keynote with `Anyone here hear any good lawyer jokes lately?'

`I was going to start with a lawyer joke, but I'm told it was already done yesterday,' said Torvalds, referring to Gates' speech the previous night.

And as he walked on stage, McNealy quipped `Anyone heard any good monopolist jokes lately?' And the Sun chief reportedly could not get on with his address until he had cracked every gag in the book about archrival Microsoft.

His `Top 10' list at Comdex secured his position as the King of Corn, even if it went down pretty well with the audience.

McNealy's `Top 10 signs that Microsoft just bought 20 per cent of Las Vegas':

10. Magicians Siegfried and Roy have a new trick that makes Judge Jackson disappear.

9. On every fourth pull the slot machines have to be rebooted.

8. The rollercoaster at the New York New York hotel only goes down.

7. The pirates at the Treasure Island hotel really steal your money.

6. The headquarters for Windows 2000 marketing moves to the Mirage hotel.

5. Crooner Wayne Newton changes his signature tune to Start Me Up.

4. All new development stops immediately.

3. Microsoft buys 20 per cent of Reno and Atlantic City and puts Windows CE in all the gaming machines.

2. The showgirls all strip down to their Visual Basics.

1. The biggest game in town is Monopoly.

Comdex Vox Pops

Everyone has a comment or an opinion about Comdex, both the combo Sydney version and Las Vegas. So from the `you'd predict they'd say that' department . . .

`Windows CE doesn't cut it . . . especially when you cram into a small space, you need flexibility'Linus Torvalds`The relaunch of Comdex to the Australian conference circuit has been 'disappointing' for organisers, presenters and exhibitors'Lead of story by IDG reporter Luisa Bustos`Comdex will absolutely be back in Sydney next year'Rob Irving, director of marketing for N+I and Comdex organiser Ziff Davis Events`Anyone heard any good lawyer jokes lately?'

Bill Gates, chairman of Microsoft

`I've had a pretty good couple of weeks - I don't know about you all'Scott McNealy, chairman and chief executive officer of Sun Microsystems

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